omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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