Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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