In the future we'll all be gay
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
