Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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