I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
