My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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