No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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