My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
