What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
