Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Do you still have your period?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
