I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
