How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize