in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
