He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Holy shit dude........stairs
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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