Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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