I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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