I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
