I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
