I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
