Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
