I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
