i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Randomize
