I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
