Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize