Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
