Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
