used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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