If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
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Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
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you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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