And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
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