Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
