will power is for people who don't want to get laid
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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