we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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