Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize