Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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