shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
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