You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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