I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
