dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I wear drunk well.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
