Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
