The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
