I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".