The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
