At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
