I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
