My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
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I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
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Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
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