I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
