If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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