I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
we should paint friendship bongs
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