dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
