You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
