Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize
