So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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